I made it
September 30, 2017 | September 30, 2017 | 0 comment(s)
For what I've been saying to myself over and over, for what I have been endlessly convincing myself for so long, for what I have been forcefully reassuring myself to believe, finally today I could say it. I made it.
It has been too many phases, I've been holding on for too long. I'm done feeding on my own illusive expectations, my own lies --- for years and years.
For the sight of a slight update which used to excite, it didn't affect me as much now. For what used to break me badly once, I discovered the same thing recently and it didn't haunt me as much. The presence of someone new in your life instead brought me a smile, almost like a validation -- that it is finally the right time to completely let go. Surprisingly what consumed me was tranquility rather than what used to be sadness and disappointment . I finally realised. What used to be a deep sigh now becomes a breath of relief. It's not hate, it's not denying. It's finally accepting.
For all the answers I yearned for, I finally discovered the real one answer -- questions aren't always meant to be answered. For all the opportunities I missed along the way, I would treat all the lessons as my compensation.
For what isn't meant to be. I am letting you go. With a smile